Chuck Norris Can Reach a Conclusion without Any Evidence

Turns out, there are more facts about Chuck Norris than his ability to slam a revolving door or win a game of Connect Four in only three moves or touch MC Hammer. He’s now capable of making Glenn Beck look sane.

In a column for World Net Daily, Norris strings together conspiracy theory after conspiracy to speculate as to why President Obama signed an executive order granting certain immunities to INTERPOL. You know, the same immunities granted to all international organizations under the International Organizations Immunities Act that serve to protect foreign nations from having their classified records and data searched and seized by the US government. The same immunities that even Fox News panelists described as “benign”.

But let’s see what Chuck has to say:

Is it merely coincidental that Obama signed this executive Interpol order and that New York is the feds’ city of choice to place 9/11 terrorists on trial in federal court?

Is it merely coincidental that Obama signed this executive Interpol order and that, if for any reason the White House can’t give terrorist detainees U.S. constitutional privileges by being tried in civilian courts, they now have the close proximity of Interpol archives that are exempt from American legal or investigative discovery? …

Is it merely coincidental that Obama signed this executive Interpol order and that the feds want to try these 9/11 terrorists in civilian courts rather than military courts, and undoubtedly don’t want to lose the cases in public opinion by the dissemination of the trials’ details and evidence?

I’m not quite sure I follow, Chuck. It sounds like you’re criticizing Obama for trying terrorists in civilian courts rather than military courts, and then you speculate that he plans to use INTERPOL to keep details and evidence from these trials away from the public. That’s odd, since “civilian trials must be open to the public, while military tribunals can be held in secret”. But do go on.

Is it merely coincidental that Obama signed this executive Interpol order and that the following events are converging at this time in America’s history: the U.S. withdrawal from Iraq, the closure of Guantanamo Bay terrorist detention facility, Obama’s indifference and even defense of Islamic extremists like the Fort Hood shooter or Northwest flight 253’s attempted bomber, the feds’ decision to conduct jihadists trials in New York and the search and seizure exemption of Interpol in New York and throughout the U.S.?

You mind providing a link to these claims that Obama has defended “Islamic extremists like the Fort Hood shooter or Northwest flight 253’s attempted bomber”? I guess Chuck Norris doesn’t need to click on a link to get to a website. He just stares at the computer screen and the website comes to him.

I have no doubt that Interpol will become Obama’s secret vault for terrorists’ criminal records and evidence – and whatever else he and his Cabinet want to place in there.

Chuck Norris doesn’t need to hide things in a secret vault. They hide themselves because they fear Chuck Norris.

This is just the beginning of what Washington can and will do with this executive order that Obama signed. And it’s just one more example of the way your federal government has got the backs of those who are attacking our country, abandoning our Constitution and dissolving America’s sovereignty.

Chuck Norris has got the backs of those who are attacking our country … by giving them a roundhouse kick.

In the end, there appears to be one true advantage for the president’s executive order to exempt Interpol from search and seizure: There will always be a safe and tamper-proof place where Obama can store his original, long-form birth certificate.

Chuck Norris doesn’t need to see proof of birth. Chuck Norris simply decides who is allowed to be born and where.

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Death Metal Rooster

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Why I’m Happy Palin’s Joining Fox News

This will provide Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert with a lot of great material.

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Racial Profiling is a Terrible Strategy

In a commendable act of patriotism, “Muslims, Arab-Americans and Nigerian-Americans stood together Friday outside the federal courthouse [in Detroit] to speak out against terrorism and Islamic extremists…. The rally was held during the U.S. District Court arraignment of terror suspect Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab, who is accused of trying to blow up a Northwest Airlines jet bound for Detroit Metropolitan Airport on Christmas Day.”

If we are ever to completely eradicate the threat of Islamic terrorism in the U.S., the path of the protestors in Detroit has to become drastically more appealing to Muslims than the path of the Underpants Bomber. Racial profiling, which is not only unconstitutional and illegal (via the Equal Protection Clause of the Fourteenth Amendment), would be extremely counterproductive to achieving this goal.

It’s important to understand that Al Qaeda exists in two forms: an organization and a movement. U.S. counter-insurgency efforts in Afghanistan serve to fight Al Qaeda in the first form. Fighting Al Qaeda the “movement” is a much more difficult battle. In his great overview of the structural problems with Al Qaeda, Thomas Rid describes the movement as:

… people who barely qualify as a group: young second- and third-generation Muslims in the diaspora who are engaged in a more amateurish but persistent holy war, fueled by their own complex personal discontents. Al Qaeda’s challenge is to encompass the jihadis who drift to the criminal and eccentric fringe while keeping alive its appeal to the Muslim mainstream and a rhetoric of high aspiration and promise.

To fight this movement, we need to make it less attractive to Muslim individuals who “drift to the criminal and eccentric fringe”. Abroad, this can be achieved through nation building and foreign policy. Domestically, the best strategy is to make American Muslims feel like Americans, and not like foreigners in their own country. Racially profiling Arabs clearly would not serve this goal. Instead it would drive a few deranged American Muslims to sympathize with, and possibly mimic, the actions of the Underpants Bomber rather than those of the protestors in Detroit.

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Gotta Give Fox News Credit on This One

After prominent figures on the right, and their zombie followers, jumped to conclusions of conspiracy over President Obama’s executive order granting certain immunities to INTERPOL, a panel on Fox News quelled the resulting hyperbolic nontroversy. Don’t expect any retractions from Beck, Limbaugh or others in the near future.

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Beware of Conservatism

With members of the religious right warned to “beware of science fiction” because prominent names in the field are atheists or preach secularism, I wonder what they would think of Barry Goldwater, hero of modern American Conservatism.

But like any powerful weapon, the use of God’s name on one’s behalf should be used sparingly. The religious factions that are growing throughout our land are not using their religious clout with wisdom. They are trying to force government leaders into following their position 100 percent. If you disagree with these religious groups on a particular moral issue, they complain, they threaten you with a loss of money or votes or both.
I’m frankly sick and tired of the political preachers across this country telling me as a citizen that if I want to be a moral person, I must believe in “A,” “B,” “C” and “D.” Just who do they think they are? And from where do they presume to claim the right to dictate their moral beliefs to me?
And I am even more angry as a legislator who must endure the threats of every religious group who thinks it has some God-granted right to control my vote on every roll call in the Senate. I am warning them today: I will fight them every step of the way if they try to dictate their moral convictions to all Americans in the name of “conservatism.”
- Barry Goldwater, Speech in the US Senate, 16 September 1981

That sound you just heard was the sound of teabaggers self-destructing.

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Beware of the Founding Fathers

If members of the religious right are to “beware of science fiction” because prominent names in the field are atheists or agnostics, then they may wish to beware of the founding fathers as well. However, this may create a logical paradox for constitution-touting teabaggers and cause them to self-destruct (Warning: self-destruction resulting from logical paradoxes is a reference to a theme in atheist/agnostic/secularist/sacrilegious sci-fi).

“To talk of immaterial existences is to talk of nothings. To say that the human soul, angels, God, are immaterial, is to say they are nothings, or that there is no God, no angels, no soul. I cannot reason otherwise: but I believe I am supported in my creed of materialism by Locke, Tracy, and Stewart. At what age of the Christian church this heresy of immaterialism, this masked atheism, crept in, I do not know. But a heresy it certainly is.”
- Thomas Jefferson, Letter to John Adams, August 15, 1820

“Question with boldness even the existence of a God; because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason, than that of blindfolded fear…. But those facts in the Bible which contradict the laws of nature, must be examined with more care, and under a variety of faces…. If it ends in a belief that there is no God, you will find incitements to virtue in the comfort and pleasantness you feel in its exercise, and the love of others which it will procure you.”
- Thomas Jefferson, Letter to Peter Carr, August 10, 1787

“I almost shudder at the thought of alluding to the most fatal example of the abuses of grief which the history of mankind has preserved — the Cross. Consider what calamities that engine of grief has produced! With the rational respect that is due to it, knavish priests have added prostitutions of it, that fill or might fill the blackest and bloodiest pages of human history.”
- John Adams, Letter to Thomas Jefferson, 3 September 1816

“As the Government of the United States of America is not, in any sense, founded on the Christian religion; as it has in itself no character of enmity against the laws, religion, or tranquillity, of Mussulmen; and, as the said States never entered into any war, or act of hostility against any Mahometan nation, it is declared by the parties, that no pretext arising from religious opinions, shall ever produce an interruption of the harmony existing between the two countries.”
- US Treaty with Tripoli, 1796-1797. Signed by John Adams during George Washington’s second term as President.

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The Religious Right Takes on Sci-Fi

Oh Lord:

Science fiction takes the reader into a strange world without God. Oh, there might be “a god,” a “force,” but it is definitely not the God of the Bible, and the prominent names in this field are atheists. …

Science fiction is intimately associated with Darwinian evolution. Sagan and Asimov, for example, were prominent evolutionary scientists. Sci-fi arose in the late 19th and early 20th century as a product of an evolutionary worldview that denies the Almighty Creator. In fact, evolution IS the pre-eminent science fiction. Beware!

Thanks for the warning, but I think I’ll be able to handle some science-fiction from atheist authors.

Here’s a clip from the Star Trek: Voyager episode, Distant Origin, which just so happens to be one of my favorite episodes from the entire Star Trek universe. Beware!

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Obama Gave INTERPOL … Nope, Just Another Half-Baked, Right-Wing Nontroversy

One of the completely hyperbolic and inaccurate memes/conspiracy theories floating around the conservative blogosphere these days is that President Obama has transferred American sovereignty over to INTERPOL (the International Criminal Police Organization, not the band).

Here are some of the page titles appearing on the first page of results from a google search for obama+interpol:

  • Did Obama exempt Interpol from same legal …
  • Why Does Interpol Need Immunity from American Law?
  • Did Obama give INTERPOL more power last week?
  • Obama grants Interpol immunity as foreign ‘assets’ assigned to …
  • Obama Surrenders U.S. Sovereignty: His INTERPOL …
  • O’s INTERPOL Executive Order: immunity for Obama?

Yeah, yeah. We know. New World Order. Obama’s a communist, fascist, marxist trying to turn us over to the world’s police state … or something like that.

Since I generally don’t believe what I hear from the Glenn Beck/Alex Jones crowd, I decided to go beyond the first page of search results and find out a little more about what was actually involved in this executive order.

So, I found out a bit about what INTERPOL actually is and does (skip past these quotes for a summary):

Contrary to its portrayal in some movies, Interpol has no police force that conducts investigations and makes arrests. Rather, it serves its 188 member countries by working as a clearinghouse for police departments in different nations to share law enforcement information — like files on wanted criminals and terrorists, stolen cars and passports, and notices that a law enforcement agency has issued an arrest warrant for a fugitive.

In the United States, a bureau at the Justice Department staffed by American officials transmits information between law enforcement agencies and Interpol. If a foreign country issues an arrest warrant for a person inside the United States, it is up to the United States government, based on its own laws, to decide whether to apprehend the suspect.

“We don’t send officers into the field to arrest people; we don’t have agents that go investigate crimes,” said Rachel Billington, an Interpol spokeswoman. “This is always done by the national police in the member country under their national laws.”

And a bit of background information on the executive order:

On June 16, 1983, President Reagan signed Executive Order 12425, which designated the International Criminal Police Organization (INTERPOL) as a public international organization entitled to enjoy the privileges, exemptions and immunities conferred by the International Organizations Immunities Act.

The [IOIA], signed into law in 1945, established a special group of foreign or international organizations whose members could work in the U.S. and enjoy certain exemptions from US taxes and search and seizure laws.

There are about 75 organizations in the US covered by the [IOIA] — including the United Nations, the International Atomic Energy Agency, … even the International Pacific Halibut Commission and Inter-American Tropical Tuna Commission.

Recognizing a group under the [IOIA] means officials from those organizations are exempt from some taxes and customs fees, and that their records cannot be seized. This … is so these organizations can work throughout the world without different countries spying on each other by accessing the records of these groups.

Reagan’s 1983 executive order, however, did not provide blanket exemptions for INTERPOL officials, who at the time did not have a permanent office in the US. The provisions of the International Organizations Immunities Act that INTERPOL officials were not exempt from included:

• Section 2(c), which provided officials immunity from their property and assets being searched and confiscated; including their archives;
• the portions of Section 2(d) and Section 3 relating to customs duties and federal internal-revenue importation taxes;
• Section 4, dealing with federal taxes;
• Section 5, dealing with Social Security; and
• Section 6, dealing with property taxes.

INTERPOL didn’t have a permanent office in the US until 2004, which is why it wasn’t until this month afforded the same full privileges given, say, the Inter-American Tropical Tuna Commission.

So, to summarize:

  • INTERPOL is an organization that facilitates in international police cooperation
  • INTERPOL has no police force of its own, all arrests and police activity are done by the national police in the member country under their national laws.
  • In 1983, President Reagan signed an executive order affording INTERPOL the privileges under the International Organizations Immunities Act.
  • Immunities involving taxation and “search and seizure” were not included in this order because INTERPOL did not have a permanent office in the US at the time. Basically, there was nothing to tax, search, or seize at the time.
  • INTERPOL established a permanent US office in 2004, so the IOIA exemptions from the 1983 signing were now relevant. There is now something to tax, search, and seize, so President Obama signed an executive order granting these immunities which are afforded to other IOIA organizations.
  • Search and seizure immunities exist under the IOIA because because records in such organizations can belong to foreign nations, and these nations may not wish to have their information and property seized by the US government.

And finally, here is the text of the executive order signed earlier this month:

By the authority vested in me as President by the Constitution and the laws of the United States of America, including section 1 of the International Organizations Immunities Act (22 U.S.C. 288), and in order to extend the appropriate privileges, exemptions, and immunities to the International Criminal Police Organization (INTERPOL), it is hereby ordered that Executive Order 12425 of June 16, 1983, as amended, is further amended by deleting from the first sentence the words “except those provided by Section 2(c), Section 3, Section 4, Section 5, and Section 6 of that Act” and the semicolon that immediately precedes them.

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It’s the OBP, Stupid!

I hope the signing of Miguel Olivo truly does mean that the Rockies intend to give Chris Iannetta the full workload of a starting catcher. It’d be a shame if Jim Tracy and the Rockies organization was tempted to play Olivo more than necessary, considering he has a lifetime OBP of .278, compared to Iannetta’s .361. If Iannetta gets the playing time he deserves, then I expect some nice fantasy value from him out of the catcher spot.

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